What was it like?
Before recovery I was completely dependent on alcohol. My mind, body, and spirit all depended on alcohol- couldn’t go more than 3 hours without a drink or I would go into horrific withdrawals. Which meant I had to be drinking around the clock in order to function with any sense of normalcy. I would bring it to work, trips to grocery story, A.A even… No amount of Dr. recommendations, jail cells, detox centers, hospitalizations kept me sober, and certainly couldn’t keep myself sober, I tried that; survived that way for 6 years.
What happened?
Honestly, I hated my life at the age of 24. I tried to stop, and I couldn’t- I wanted to end it for good, finally be done with all the misery. I called my mom and she took me to the 4th floor for attempted suicide and that day I realized something to change… I’ve lost loved ones to addiction as well as suicide and as a teen after losing my best friend to suicide and seeing the damaged that was caused within my family, I promised myself no matter what else happens to me in this life- I will not die by suicide. Yet there I was- at my end. At my turning point.
I got into IOP still drank unfortunately- until Covid hit and I moved in with my previous boss. Lived in her basement for safety from Covid. But really, I was living in her basement for safety from myself. I lived there for 3 months, completed IOP, didn’t pick up a drink while I was there and haven’t picked up a drink since I left over 2 years ago.
What is life like now?
Today I have the life I used to pray for- I know that sounds cheesy but it’s true. I have my driver’s licenses, a vehicle, a good job that knows a little of story and allows me to work using my experience, strength, and hope. I have money that’s saving in an account, a home that’s an actual home and not a one stop party spot. My loved ones are learning to trust me again and are on this journey with me. A.A, the place I despised the most is now my second home.. but most importantly I’m learning about myself, SOBER.
I live a life today that I never really imagined myself having and I only maintain my sobriety One Day At A Time.
Is there anything else you’d like to share?
If no one has told that they love you today, I love you! There is HOPE for the “Hopeless”.